I finished secondary school in 2011 and according to how I planned my life, by 2018 I should be a master's holder and getting set for my second degree. But by 2018 I was only in 100Level: I stayed home for 6 solid years before I got admitted in 2017.

After all the years I spent at home looking for admission, finally I got it. So I promised myself never to get associated with bad friends & most importantly I won't go to any show or party (If there be need) till my 300Level at least at that level i know the ups and downs of the school, my stand as a student and the new environment I am into.

But then sometimes we have to break certain rules for few friends & loved ones. It happened when I went to a show for the first time in school to support a friend who is contesting for a beauty crown.
The show started at an ungodly hour but I had to stay at least to prove the gentle man in me.

After watching performances by various artists & presentations of awards I decided to go out & get fresh air. On getting outside after taking few steps away from the hall, behold I saw a scene - a beautiful young girl wearing white gown & laying down on the ground & it looks like she was throwing up but what got me puzzled was, after she throws up she will laugh try to stand up again but stagger & fall on the ground. Of all the things she's doing there was a guy close to her but he obviously didn't even care and not too far from her, some guys were also standing but it seems they don't even care.

I was moved to go and ask her what the problem was but then I know too well how people around here behave when it comes to ladies & I wouldn't want to be beaten for something I am not even interested in, so I left & paid deaf ears to my conscience.

After getting fresh air, on my way back to the hall I still saw this lady doing the same thing, I took a few steps then my conscience couldn't let me go, so I made up my mind to damn every consequence at least I was trying to help.
I took some bold steps & went to her, she was still laying on the floor & I spoke in Hausa language 'Yar'uwa yaya' which is 'sister what is the problem' but she kept quiet i asked again and she shook her head & gave a nonverbal answer which shows nothing was disturbing her but i insisted and she finally opened up & answered, i asked Tain & she said she's fine & laughed. So I left at least I obeyed the voice of God speaking through my conscience.

That moment she answered I could feel the smell of liquor of alcohol all over her. I was so disappointed because she was drunk, completely drunk.
My disappointment is, at that point in time, she's is vulnerable to any kind of evil: rape, used for rituals, theft and other forms of social vices.
I knew too well that any guy that succeeds in taking her home automatically has a wife for the night and if its a bunch of guys then they have a sex mate for the night. Which may result in her being molested, misused, traumatised & victimized.

I was wondering why a lady be drunk to that level, am not writing to condemn her taking alcohol but why will she take it to a level she can't control herself? Knowing fully the society we are into; even ladies that dress modestly, don't drink are being molested, and talk more of one who is completely drunk. That's a disaster!.

The funny part is, she's a student no wonder sex mostimes is used as a pay for some grades hence one can't study.
What's happening to our ladies, our aunties, our sisters where is our sense of morality?

These days the rate at which ladies patronise codeine is very alarming. Not forgetting those who take weed just because of acceptance from a guy.
Some ladies give sex as a means of saying THANK YOU for a kind gestures while others decides to sex just for a beauty crown forgetting that as a lady you are royal by nature.

A lady is schooling in Taraba but will decide to spend the weekend with a boyfriend in Abuja or Lagos. forgetting the risks associated with travelling & her academy.
Others decide to substitute character for beauty forgetting that beauty may fade away someday soon.

It's quite baffling that, we tend to forget that as Africans, we are a society built on certain fundamentals value which includes morality, discipline, respect, been well cultured to mention a few but in the quest to adapt to civilization & blend with the African culture we are gradually losing our sense of morality, decency, our cultural heritage and our pride.

As a lady you are royal by nature, you have all it takes to turn the world around and make it a better place, marriages are crashing today just because of the few things we do at this age and fail to stop it till we walk the aisle.

It is often said "we are in a man's world" it might be true but the fact is "we might be in a man's world but women rule our world as men".
What kind of wife would you like to be your husband?
what kind of mother will you want to be to your children.
Is your present behavior worth emulating assuming you have kids at present.
What Kind of a woman would you want to be in society.

Musa Affos (Rhapsodi )is a Blogger & social media activist.

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